This is a blog for my daughter Scarlett. She was born with a complex congenital heart defect known as Tetralogy of Fallot with Pulmonary Atresia. She is my little hero.

Monday, October 5, 2009

3 Days Till Surgery (for reals this time!)

I spoke with Beth (Scarlett's cardiologist) on Friday and she said that the CT scan results came back and they look good. Meaning, there weren't any unexpected surprises/changes in the past 7 months since her last CT scan.  In other words, she said that the CT scan results jive with heart cath findings of 9/9, so we're still on for surgery on Thursday 10/8....barring no emergency surgeries arise to bump her.

Scarlett had a very good weekend. Her oxygen levels are in the mid 70s and she had her gramma here with her all weekend. In honor of Grandma Elva's visit, I dressed Scarlett in the adorable fuchsia pink dress (with matching pink chonies) that grandma Elva bought her 4 months ago. It's a size 0-3 months, but it fits her just fine. I happened to have the matching fuchsia pink bow, so I put that on her too. :)

Daddy loves holding her up to practice standing, and she's really trying her best to crawl (on all fours), but she's not quite there yet. She's getting by with scooting around doing the army crawl.  I'm trying to feed her solids everyday, but she seems less interested now. She was doing pretty good last week, but this week, she's not focused....maybe she knows?... nah... that's silly to think.

I still have my suitcase packed from my 3-day hospital stay last month. I am by no means a light packer. I think this time, I'm going to pack a separate suitcase for Scarlett. Clothes, blankets, toys, movies, portable DVD player, socks, bottles, nipples, pill crusher, etc.. Then a separate one for me...toiletries, clothes, socks, etc.. I forgot my sweater last time, even though I said I better remember and sure enough I was freezing, but I just wrapped the hospital sheets/blankets around me. It's packed this time. I tend to over pack, but it's better to be prepared, right?

Well, I hope I can focus at work these next 2 1/2 days.  I'm only working a 1/2 day on Wednesday because in the morning, I want to go with Todd to take Scarlett to get her pre-op tests done. Chest x-ray, EKG, lab work, etc.. They're also gonna give us instructions on what to do the following morning, etc.. So I really want to be there. I asked for the morning off, so I'll go in around 12-1 and work the last 4 hours of my shift. (if I'm not a complete wreck from the hospital visit). I've been doing pretty good lately. I only cried at work two times last week... unlike the week after the surgical consult, which was practically everyday 2-3 times a day. (everytime someone asks me about the baby)

I really just have to believe in my heart that she's gonna be okay and everything is gonna be fine... but then I think I don't want to be a pie-in-the-sky optimist in case something horrible happens. I have faith. I have hope. I just don't want to jinx myself  by saying everything is going to be fine when there's a 10% chance....

Not knowing is the worst. :( Okay, there I go and upset myself again. I really am a total wuss. She's gonna be fine. Why am I crying? Everything is going to be okay. I believe in you Baby Girl, God's gonna take care of you, and you're gonna do great. I just know it.

1 comment:

  1. Aww this one made my cry.. I know what you mean about the unknown.. It is for sure the worse. I think that at this point its in GOD's hand mama. After all he knows best. I pary for Scarlett all the time. I have never meet you guys but she has a place in my heart she strong and she is a fighter I have faith that she will be fine and by all means she has the best of the best working on her!! I think if you guys often. Take care and god bless!!